In our new series, brides share how they chose their wedding dresses. Possibly the most exciting yet overwhelming clothing decision of your life. From the pitfalls to avoid to how to know when you’ve found “the right thing,” there’s a lot to learn from those who have been through the process. . Here, Bazaar’s senior commercial editor Roberta Schroeder reveals how she chooses her destination wedding dress.
Like most women, I had preconceptions of what shopping for a wedding dress would be like long before I ever wore an engagement ring. There would have been champagne in hand, noisy bridal shop sessions, and acres of lace and tulle. We spent a disproportionate amount of time debating satin shades, waist measurements, and heel heights, and ultimately settled on The One.
My reality was nothing more than this well-known fairy tale. I never booked a bridal party, nor did I gather a group of bridesmaids from all over the country to dress in white taffeta and watch me on a pedestal.
Overwhelmed by the whole big wedding industry complex, my partner and I decided to do something somewhere between an elopement and a traditional event, so we headed to Thailand with 25 friends and family and had a beachside ceremony. We enjoyed a casual dinner. The most important thing is the holidays. Of course, this meant that the traditional wedding dress rulebook went straight out the window, with large amounts of tulle not only dangerous to ship around the world, but added just for dresses at weddings. I know a friend who booked seats for. (long-distance flights) but it’s completely impractical to wear in 40 degree heat.
Instead, my wedding dress search revolved around practicality and ease. These two elements clearly conflict with my usual fashion priorities. Our dress code was strictly casual and we prioritized spending time with our loved ones over taking photos. My walkway was made of sand, so the One needed to be light, airy, and fluid enough to look right in bare feet.
I started by going online and ordering an armful of satin slip dresses from different designers at different price points. The first challenge for me was finding something that would provide a smooth line even over lingerie since wearing a bra wasn’t an option. Many were simply too detailed or too low-profile to do the job.
After what was probably my 20th near-identical slip dress arrived (before being promptly returned), I started doubting myself. Should I start from scratch and start considering more traditional “bridal” options? Should I actually have gathered friends and booked an appointment? Or should I keep an eye on the weather forecast and always rely on… Should I choose one of these designers?
But then along came Simkhai’s understated champagne-toned midi dress. I found this in the back of Net-a-Porter’s January sale (I was probably the only one looking for something summery like that). When it arrived, there were no audible gasps, no teary-eyed maids, no emotional moments, but it ticked all the boxes. The straps are perfectly thin, the neckline is precisely cut to allow you to sit low while wearing a bra, and the ankle-skimming hem is shredded into ribbons, making it easy to stand, sit, and sit even in the sand. You can move. Equally important was the material. Made of pure silk, it is as breathable as possible even in humid climates.
If you’re also planning a wedding abroad, the best advice is to ask yourself the following questions when shopping for a dress: Does the silhouette suit the setting? Is it too hot or too cold? Am I sacrificing comfort and peace of mind to the point that I may regret it at that moment? If your location is beachside, make Cindy Crawford your muse. Nothing looks more chic than the simplest white slip with the ocean in the background.
Compromise is the key to staying sane when planning a destination wedding, so try to enjoy letting go of control. This applies to more than just dresses. The hairstyle I had originally planned wouldn’t stand up to the humidity, and there weren’t any manicurists on the island who had neutral polishes that would suit me. On the other hand, the wine I wanted to serve was not available. But as I watched the sunset surrounded by my favorite people, no one, including me, cared whether my makeup melted or my hair frizzed (and anyway, a cold margarita is better when it’s hot) It’s delicious).
For me, the hardest part of looking for a dress was finding one that didn’t stray too far from my personal style. Had I stayed home, I might have opted for a vintage dress or perhaps a voluminous Simone Rocha dress. Totally impractical for lifting my 5 foot 2 frame. (I wanted to make a statement with my accessories instead, so I added shoulder-length gold earrings from The Attico and bright red lipstick for dancing (Mac’s Ruby Woo).) But on the beach, it’s louder and more Capital-F fashion dresses made no sense. And when the big day arrived, I couldn’t imagine wearing anything other than a piece of silk. Especially when I inevitably end up in the pool.
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