I I just beat all my friends in the new Mario Party game. It wasn’t even close. There’s certainly an element of luck in the game, but I got about a million stars and they didn’t get one. I feel like a god walking among mortals.
Then I received a text message (on my mobile phone) from a loved one over 50 years old asking how I was doing.
I reply as follows. I just beat all my friends in the new Mario Party game. It wasn’t even close! how are you? “
Their reaction shook me to my core. A lonely yellow thumb. What the hell? Everyone knows that “thumbs up” is code for “I’m not interested in your Mario Party!”
I guess Nintendo’s popular party game series might not be as universally talked about as I thought. Maybe my emotion regulation issues are also suffering from recency bias.
I create a message that cannot be ignored. “PS: I just got promoted to Junior Regional Manager!”
(No, of course I didn’t, but we’re doing a science experiment here. Calm down!)
Awesome big yellow thumb. can’t believe it!
When I see this beloved family in public, they burst into tears at the slightest sentimentality. “Look at how much I’ve grown!” I often hear people sobbing with nostalgia.
“It’s just the outside!” I insist, wishing it was somewhere other than the equidistant RSL Club in Sutherland Shire, specializing in awkward family gatherings and deconstructed nachos.
Then you will hear a click. Perhaps what young people feel about public spaces – embarrassment and inauthenticity – is the same as what “old people” feel about texts? “If you think so, just say it to my face!” atmosphere.
And we probably wouldn’t say “to your face.” Because if you react like this to us putting some kegs down, what if I tell you about a promotion? You’ll be dancing on RSL tables that look like bedknobs or brooms.
Even unmotivated staff members are unlikely to be ready for this. They aren’t even ready for nachos.
I could be completely wrong about the whole thing. It’s rare, but it’s happened before. After all, I’m human. Except for Mario Party. Damn, I’m good at Mario Party.
